Color My Own Hair?

I've been coloring my hair for the past 5 years or so.  I had a stylish, who I adored in Ames.  However, at the end of my time there, I was starting to worry about the amount of money I was spending on my hair.

As I want to be more financially stable and be actively saving for an adoption (and a few trips, and a few new things, etc), paying $120+ every 6 weeks was getting a bit pricey.  So, I have been letting the dye fade out of my hair.  It actually doesn't look bad, as the dye tends to slowly leave my hair anyway by the time I had to get it done again.

Of course, I was a bit shocked to find a few grey hairs.  But then again, I am a few years older.  I never thought I was so vain as to let a few grey hairs bother me.  And they don't.  Very much.  At least when I can't see them.

I am considering coloring my own hair.  I haven't done anything like that with my hair since I was a child, when my mother would perm my hair.  I'd guess the last time we did that I was about 10.

Tonight I looked at the colors at Target and couldn't find one I liked.  Tomorrow, I may look at Wal-mart.  Somehow I suspect Super Target will have fewer choices than the Super Walmart will.  If all fails, I can try Walgreens.

I usually color my hair a red color; sometimes a very bright red.  So I want to find a nice auburn color and add some blonde highlights (again a look I've done before - with the stylist's help of course).

I'm a bit concerned about attempting this project, but I also know that I can go to the salon and cut off some if need be.  I will try to document the transformation  when it happens this weekend.

If I don't chicken out.

The Problem of Singleness in the American Christian Church

I've attended churches of various sizes and denominations.  One uniform problem I encounter is that churches don't know what to do with singles.  

By that, I mean that churches are so focused on married people and children, that they do not address the potential needs, desires and lifestyle issues of singles. 

Some churches attempt to address singleness by having "singles only" classes, events and small groups.  I have enjoyed this type of programming, but there are a few problems with it.  First, there is a tendency that the groups become meat markets, where feelings are hurt by indiscrete daters or by others pressuring dating couples to "hurry up and marry."  Additionally, these churches believe they are addressing the issue when in reality the rest of the programming again focuses on marrieds.  In other words, there is no integration between singles and marrieds.  

These programs tend to be focused at young singles, not middle-aged or elderly singles.  The reality of the lonely widower persists, as the church does not address those issues.

In other churches, singles are viewed as diseased with marriage the only cure.  In these groups, there is a lot of pressure to date, mate and procreate.  

Many churches do not recognize women as leaders.  In these churches, women are regulated to nursery duty or teaching sunday school as their service and leadership options.  Serving on the Elder Board or as an adult teacher is not possible.

Churches that allow women ministers do marginally better.  Another danger for singles is that people believe singles have unlimited time to do church things.  Singles may have more time, but in other ways we have less as there is no one to help complete the household chores - sole responsibility for the lawn, laundry, dishes, cleaning, dog walking and car repair falls on the individual.

So how can the church address these problems? I'll tackle that in another post.

 Sunday night was the 50th running of the Knoxville Nationals.  A crowd of over 23,000 watched the 50 lap feature.  I spent most of the day volunteering at the National Sprint Car Hall of Fame (one of my favorite places).  Here is what I learned while in Knoxville all day.
1.  Aussies love sprint car racing.  Each year, more and more Aussies show up at Knoxville.  One man I spoke with last night estimated that a couple thousand Aussies were at the Nationals.  Amazingly, the local and national media haven't picked up on this story - that Aussies come to America to visit IOWA to watch racing.
2.  Race Fans Can't Recognize Drivers.  Fans wearing Tony Stewart gear won't recognize Smoke, even if he holds the door for them and waits with them for an elevator.  Fans are no better at seeing Kasey Kahne when he is walking around either.  Apparently, remove the firesuit, become invisible.
3.  Aussies are flirts.  Do I really need to explain this?

4.  It ain't over until it's over.  With 5 to go, it appeared that the race would either go to Donny Schatz or Sammy Swindell.  The pair started swapping the lead each turn until with 3 to go, Swindell's left rear tire blew.  Then everyone presumed Schatz would win (some fans left the stands at this point).  Then on the restart, Schatz's engine started to go and Tim Shaffer motored to the win.
5.  Good guys can finish first. I met Tim several years ago when he made a special trip into the museum to sign some items for a benefit. This was despite the fact he was unable to race at the time because of an injury.  But he still made the trip and followed through with the things he had committed to do.  That speaks volumes for his character.

Mind the Gap: Bras

This summer, I've spent a few hot days at racing events and other outdoor activities.  It is becoming very clear to me that as a society, women have lost the ability to check their appearance in a mirror.

Yesterday, I saw several women who attempted to wear a white shirt with a black bra, a couple girls who wore a tank top that didn't cover the bra at all and a few sheer shirts with lacy bras underneath.  Sadly, most of these women were over the age of 30 and would have been shocked to realize what they were advertising, but for lack of a mirror did not know.

Presumably, none of these women looked at how they looked in a mirror.  Otherwise, I'm fairly certain they would have changed clothes.  I doubt the 45 or something woman who wore a sheer shirt realized she was flashing nipples at everyone, including her 3 year old grandson who was with her.  Indeed, the woman who wore the one-shoulder shirt probably didn't realize that from the size, her entire breast was visible.

However, these fashion faux pas could have been averted with a single mirror.  Alas, mirrors are rare and many do not know how to use them properly.

Maybe we ought to take up a collection for women without a mirror, so they don't subject the rest of us to an unintended viewing of their chests.

New Goals

I've been tinkering with the idea of setting a few new goals.  I don't like to set New Year's Resolutions, as January doesn't strike me as a good time to set the goals I need to accomplish.  However, around the time school starts, I feel like things are new again.  These are a few progressive goals I hope to achieve.

1.  Exercise regularly - I just bought a new treadmill.  I'm hoping to develop a habit of regularly using it or walking outside.
- I'd like to start jobbing/running.
- Ideally, I'd like to run a 5K
- Then a 10K
- A half-marathon
- Marathon

2.  Develop a regular Bible Study plan.  I run in streaks on this.  Sometimes (like for 18 months at a time) I can do a regular read through the Bible.  Then I need to switch to a written study, and then take a break. I've been on a break for a while.  Hopefully I can start a more disciplined approach soon.
- I'd like to do focused studies on prayer, discipleship, and women in ministry
- I want to increase my prayer time.
- Maintain my Hebrew vocabulary by building in time reading the Bible in Hebrew.

3.  Make progress on adopting/ foster parenting.
- I am signed up to take the foster parents training in September.
- I need to decide on an adoption agency or set intercountry adoption aside for a time
- Part of this process is saving more money for the costs of the adoption

4.  I'm tinkering with the idea of another pet.  I want to make a decision on this soon.


As I write this, I recognize that I probably will fall short in a few areas, but I also know that I need to write these goals down so that I can hold myself accountable.

My Newest Pet Peeve

I’ve noticed that it is trendy for Christians to play fast and loose with certain terms.  Every few years one term falls out of favor and a new one is added to the lexicon.

For example, some are rejecting “Christian” and instead using “Christ-followers” instead.  While I understand that the people insisting on this change are striving to lose the negative connotations, reinventing the wheel also leads to more confusion among everyone.

But my biggest pet peeve is applying the term “monasticism” to communal living by families and married persons.  Monasticism is defined as living in a monastery, convent, nunnery, or abbey by unmarried persons.   To say you are living “monastically” when you have really just moved to a commune with your wife and kids strikes me as missing the point at best and at worst completely misleading everyone.

Historically  for over 2,000 years, the terms has NOT been applied to married people.  By co-opting the term and applying it to a situation that is inaccurate diminishes its meaning to future generations and the significance in our history.

To be a monk in a monastic community meant (and means) that sacrifices were made: primarily marriage and family.  In Medieval times, living in a monastery may have been a benefit, as there was usually food, learning, and community.

Today, monastic living is more about the sacrifice – try living in today’s society as a single person.  From the outside looking in, the world believes you are homosexual, weird, and/or undesirable. Our society values pairing off, and to see someone deliberately or not so deliberately choose otherwise is disconcerting to society.

As a single Protestant woman, I often joke that at least Catholic singles receive the “spiritual benefit” of choosing to be singles as a nun or monk.  In my Protestant circles, which heavily value and tout marriage and family, I’m more often viewed as a anomaly.

Perhaps that is why I dislike the use of terms relating to singleness being redefined to include marriage.  I mean, as a single Christian, I have to forego sex, can’t you keep your married paws off my single-meaning terms?

The Problem of Purity in Today's Christian Church

From where I sit, as a Single Christian Woman, the American church has a major purity problem.  Living in a sex-drenched society, the church does not address sexual purity.

Christians decry abortion, but refuse to educate their children about the blessings of celibacy and how to practically achieve that purity in daily life. Division rips at the Church on the issue of homosexuality, but we wink and smirk at heterosexual sex outside of marriage.  We ignore the issue of pornography (except to say we are against it in some vague, undefined way) and refuse to acknowledge its creeping encroachment in our lives via the internet, TV, and movies.

It is not surprising that today’s American Christian is just as likely to have sex outside of marriage (either before, during or after), create children before marriage,  have an unhappy, unsexually fulfilled marriage, and get divorced!

Today’s most endangered species in America?  A virgin over 18 years of age.  Purity is not a value American culture celebrates.  Having sex with as many people as possible is the name of the game.  Movies are plotted around the idea that without having sex, one cannot have a fulfilling existence, cannot be popular and is somehow “weird.”  Glossing over the issues of pregnancy, STDs and relationship difficulties that multiply with multiple partners, American Society wants everyone to join in the orgy.  After all, there are no consequences, right?

Instead of pointing out the myriad of problems that come with multiple sexual partners, viewing pornography and refusing to submit the body, the Christian Church ignores much of the problem.  The sexual purity line is drawn around homosexuals and abortioners, not women reading graphic romance novels or men viewing Playboy videos.

Jesus had other ideas.  He declared, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”  Matthew 5:27-28.     I doubt Jesus would be happy at the state of Purity in the American Church.

Paul, picking up Jesus’ theme, wrote about purity.  His desire was clearly in line with Jesus’: “I have written you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people – not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral or the greedy and swindlers, or idolators.  In that case you would have to leave this world.  But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolator, or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler.  With such a man do not even eat.” I Cor. 5:9-11.  He later writes, “The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.” 1 Cor. 6:13b.

It is not enough to say that “We are against pre-marital sex,” (even though that alone would be a refreshing change- most churches are silent on the issue).  No, the Church needs to step up and provide help to individuals struggling with purity burdens.  We need to accept less of the pornographic ideas that society tries to feed us through the internet, fashion, TV, movies and accepted social behaviors.

We need to equip our pre-teens and teens to deal with the issues of intimacy, calling them to deep, but pure, relationships with others.  We need to teach our young women how to dress modestly in the fashion culture that prefers to show off the entire body.  Young men need to be mentored about the dangers of idolizing the bodies of women who appear in skin magazines and movies (reality is unlike to measure up).

To leave sex to those outside of the Church, which has been the default position of the American Church since the Puritans hit Plymouth Rock, is irresponsible and dangerous.  It is time to reclaim the Church’s rightful position in society as the Oracle of Purity.  We need to proclaim the benefits of sex within marriage, the joy of purity, and cease the striving and distortion that society’s view of sexuality creates.

God invented sex – and He invented the Rules about it.  We cannot keep ignoring our corporate obligation to society and worse, to our youth (in age and Christianity) without heaping coals in our own lap.

And at this rate, the fire is already kindling.